"Take Me To Church": Seduction: Worship, and Spiritual Suicide (A Review)

When I started to fall in love with British artist Hozier's first mega-hit, I had to take a minute to seriously consider the possibility that I was adding to the moral corruption of my generation. I mean, how could a song sounds so delicious, intermingle sexual and religious themes, and NOT be straight out of Hades? The lyrics are, in a word, irreverent (or rather, differently-reverent), and I'm sure that in some cases it's encouraged unhealth in peoples' lives in minds-- in other words, I'm sure the song's popular embrace is at least partly based in all the interpretations of the song which it might be false. But because it is art, and especially good art, there are a LOT of interpretations of the song-- and I'm free to love it for all the interpretations which might be true.
I already said it's good art-- I'll raise the bar and argue that it's aesthetically true. The melody and other sound elements embody the visceral ache of devotion much better than most songs about devotion that I've heard recently. It's difficult to lift up the notes of the song without entering into the emotional space its lyrics put forth. And that might be exactly why some are wary of it-- what headspace are we entering? Are we bowing down before the altar of sex when we sing this song?
Sort of. You can't read the lyrics of the song without being struck by the transference of worship language to sexual themes. I'd hate to cause a sensation (especially among those who know me as a Christian on the Asexual Spectrum), but this sexy spirituality itself doesn't bother me in the least. Nature-- even and especially sex-- is overflowing with spirituality, even divinity. John Muir is attributed as saying, “I'd rather be in the mountains thinking about God, than in church thinking about the mountains.”  Maybe this narrator is just … admiring a different peak.
So if Hozier('s narrator character) was really disconnecting from religion because sex provided an alternative spiritual experience, that would be simple. But look at the lyrics again: Sex, personified as the narrator's goddess-priestess-lover, doesn't seem to providing spiritual fulfillment either. The 'Church' (sex) to which he's begging to go is pleasing and feels somehow 'ultimate', sure, but it's also dishonest and demanding, masochistic at best and cannibalistic at worst. The journey plays out a “sad earthly scene” that seems to humble everyone, especially “masters and kings”-- this goddess seems to eat the colloquial 'high horse' and leave its own rider to starve. He adopts the general feeling that this is a sickness, but of course, he loves it: sex may or may not be true, but it's the truest thing he has-- or the truest thing that has him. The attitude, in this interpretation, is more of a resigned hedonism in the face of inevitability than a freely-committed worship.
So Hozier's song places sex in the role of this huge, powerful force that makes humanity weak at the knees and bends our identity toward itself with its offer of self-serving pleasure. But the intermingling of religious imagery speaks, to me, about the reality that religious devotion so often plays this twisted role too. (If you're skeptical, just see if you can distinguish C-Pop lyrics from lines from 50 Shades.) As Christians, we have to confess that we've too often offered this same creepy, self-immolating adoration to God and the Church, propagating the toxic attitude that willfully strangling the spirit could ever be a good or redemptive thing to do. This posturing speaks to a deep suicidal impulse in humanity that leads us to throw our own souls onto any fire we can find-- sex, religion, drugs, mob mentalities, persistent delusions-- anything to feel the sweet release of draining ourselves of the responsibility of identity. Maybe this is the original sin, or our subconscious guilt response to it.
  The God I know does not want, is not jealous for, this kind of worship that subsumes the worshipper into the object of adoration. God is absolutely rooting for us to live into our full identities and not throw ourselves away-- especially to 'him'. How painful for the parent to hear the 'faithful' son say, "I slaved for you"-- as if we didn't know that everything God has is ours. This son was more 'prodigal' than the other. So far as this song is about the overpowering impulse to adoration in sex and religion, it is absolutely true-- except that it is hopeless. And I'm not suggesting that Hozier croon 'If only I had Jesus!" as a tacked-on refrain, or change the 'amen' to a 'Hosanna'-- though in the Christian Music Industry that dishonest and anti-artistic rubbish is standard practice. The narrator is painting a beautiful picture of the complexities of self-entrapment while still trapped. We have to let the song be that. When we enter into the song, we have to enter into a space of hopelessness, because that is the honest human experience of subsuming adoration. None of us is better than that or wiser than that wild blindness; it just manifests itself differently in different lives, and we have to remember that with humility and appreciation and connect to this artist in that space.
   But we don't have to stay there forever. The beautiful thing about art of any kind is that it allows for both experience and reflection. And upon reflection, we can honestly say that we are not destined for this joyful suicide-- that the pulse of life beats defiant against the draw of death. God does will for us to have Life Abundant-- faith and sex and imagination and community that are healthy, life-affirming, supremely humanizing, and offered in free will. It's a whole life that we can admire like John Muir admired the mountains-- with genuine reverence for all its diverse, organic chaos, and with freedom from compulsion and self-loathing. Amen. Amen. Amen.

~ ~ ~

Afterword: The Music Video. Ok, the music video was a huge part of this song's global success, so even though it's under no obligation to be thematically linked to the lyrics, it's worth considering here. The heart-and-tear-wrenching video depicts two lovers being torn apart by a violent homophobic 'community' group in Russia. This is based on an actual current trend, and it might be happening to a real couple even as you read this. The groups are not religious, but may be backed by certain religious sentiments. Hozier actually did an interview explaining the video's link to his personal views that no religious or other human system should constrict or demonize what is most beautiful about life. This overpowering hateful groupthink, rather than sex, has become the enslaving 'church' in the video: the actual sexual relationship is depicted as innocent and beautiful; while the murderers that adopt the dark overtones of senseless identity-erasing commitment described in the song. A confusing role reversal, but one that confirms the deeper issue.

Seven Secret Strengths of High-Functioning Autistic People

This article is an ode to us. It’s for anyone who considers themselves a High-Functioning Autistic (HFA) person or an ‘Aspie’ (Asperger Syndrome is one specific disorder that's on the high-functioning end of the Autism Spectrum). It’s also for the folks who are lucky enough to make up our families and circles of friends. We ‘Spectrum Surfers’ have plenty of opportunities to reflect on our challenges-- it’s about time we focused a little more on how kick-ass we really are. 

So, here are a few of the things that many HFA people are really freaking good at:

1. Social Learning
Society seems to have gotten the cockamamy impression that we Spectrum Surfers are ‘socially slow’. Are you kidding me? Most of us started out with a completely empty social tool kit. Ask us-- most of us have warm fuzzy childhood stories of spitting on our friends, throwing chairs at teachers, or hiding under our parents’ work desk for hours on end. The fact that so many of us have ‘caught up’ so much is a testament to our amazing ability to learn. It’s like communication itself is a second language that we’re constantly having to translate ourselves into, and that takes an absurd amount of smarts.

2. Compassion
The stereotypical portrayal of autistic people as cold and unfeeling is, for the most part, a big load of poppycock. Many of us have trouble fluidly communicating the standard ‘I care’ cues (eye contact, tone of voice, etc.), but we actually ‘co-suffer’ a LOT-- according to one study, maybe TOO much, so that we shut down in self-defense. Once we can learn to maintain emotional boundaries, though, we can beautifully live into our identities as keenly sensitive individuals, and our insights into the emotional environments of spaces can be a great contribution to group settings. 

3. Integrity
When you live inside your head as much as HFA people do, cognitive dissonance is not really an option. That means we tend to be really freaking honest (and often bad liars when we try!). We also really stick to our guns-- we will not budge when we’ve made up our minds. If we don’t ‘do’ hugs, you’re not getting one! Want us to help you cheat? Nyu-uh! Usually by adulthood, we know exactly who we are and what we stand for. 

4. Getting Shit Done
Many of us HFA’s tend to be what I call ‘Hyperfunctional’. We really love it when a plan comes together, and we will work to the point of obsession to see a project through to completion. We often have only very specific but intense interests, but we often follow those interests through to full mastery. Some of us thrive on collaborative projects with specific direction, while others work best when we’re generating our own ideas and projects. Whatever the case, when we set our minds to something, there’s not a lot that can stop us. 

5. Super-Sensing
Many AS people perceive senses differently-- our taste buds, etc, are not physically different, but our unique brains often focus on them differently, sometimes heightening our perceptions to intense levels. On the one hand, it can be pretty hard to function when your perception of touch (/hearing/sight/smell/taste) is turned up about a thousand percent. On the other hand, it’s kind of a freaking super power. For example, I’m often surprised to learn that I was the only one in the room who was aware of something exciting going on within earshot outside. That’s why it is really hard to sneak up on some of us-- and if you do, be warned! We may freak out (or punch you!)-- we are so not used to that happening. 

6. Arts, Music, and Technical Skills
Social communication is tough for us, but we aren’t some alien species who simply don’t need to communicate! That’s why so many of us turn to the visual arts, writing, music, and technical creation, all of which can fill an aching need in our soul to translate our inner worlds and visions outside of ourselves. In these slower forms of communication, we have time to be intentional with our expression. Developing a talent also serves a very specific social function in that it often helps other people to understand us as 'able' and take us more seriously than they might otherwise. (Allies can help us out by noticing our talents, but also seeing past them to appreciate our full personhood!)

7. Partnership
Starting and maintaining intimate relationships, platonic or romantic, can be really hard for us, and we each need a partner who is a good fit and has a lot of grace for us. However, for all the reasons listed above and a thousand more, if you have landed yourself a best friend on the Autistic Spectrum, you can bet we will be stellar confidantes, helpers, motivators, and life-mates. And if your lover is AS, you know it’s worth every second of wishing we had any idea how to flirt or carefully navigating our often-unique sexual identities. Because most of us don’t do anything halfway-- especially loving.

Did I miss some? Overstate some? Completely misrepresent some? Let me know in the squawk box below! 

Note: These generalizations are given as a starting point, not a definite map of every HFA’s skill set. I also use a lot of terms to refer to people on the Autistic Spectrum. As with all identity issues, you should refer to people in the vocabulary that they use to describe themselves. 

Note II: this article has almost nothing to do with Savantism. It’s very rare for anyone to have Savant-level genius, and it’s been damaging to the Autism conversation to assume that (1) many Autistic people have savant skills and (2) ‘Regular’ Autistic people don’t ‘count’. None of that silliness here. We’re all fantastic. Capiche?

Elizabeth Rhea is finishing up her MA in Narrative and Social Change in Claremont, California. She believes that telling better stories-- including better stories about Autism-- can lead to compassion and change in society.